People generally oversimplify the biblical instructions about judgment . https://getbride.org/pt/blog/sao-noiva-por-correspondencia-ilegais/ They read verses like Matthew 7:1 and think Christians are never to judge. But in context, Matthew 7:1 is really talking about judging someone’s heart and motives. We are not supposed to do that. This passage takes place during the Sermon on the Mount. And the whole point of the Sermon on the Mount was to highlight the importance of inner obedience to God.
But notice in Matthew 7:5 Jesus said that after you have addressed your own sin, then you are to actually judge and help other people address their own sin too. While we must not judge someone’s heart, we are to take notice of people’s actions (1 Corinthians 5:9-13).
The dating principle we can form from all this is that you want to trade an overly critical, judgmental spirit for a more realistic set of biblical requirements. In other words, if your requirements for people are stricter than Scripture’s requirements for people, you are making it very difficult for anyone to want to get to know you.
The Bible basically requires three things for Christians when it comes to marrying someone . They need to be a Christian, they need to be bearing fruit as a Christian, and they need to be able to fulfill the biblical roles in marriage for a husband and wife. Don’t date someone if they can’t meet these minimum biblical requirements. But if you are looking for someone who never does anything wrong, you will push everyone away from you.
Passage: 2 Timothy 2:22, “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”
But it will also protect your heart by keeping you out of pointless relationships
Pointless dating is when you think a boyfriend or girlfriend is a title that can last forever. Pointless dating is when you waste your time playing games with someone you know you will never marry one day.
Purposeful dating, however, is when you know dating is a tool to help you figure out what God’s will is for you and someone. You don’t need to know you will marry the person you are dating. That’s the point of dating, to figure that out. But you are also unwilling to waste your time dating someone you already know you will never marry.
Now please don’t get me wrong. Purposeful dating should not be too serious too soon. You can still go one dates, have fun, get to know people, and don’t talk about marriage on the first date. This will scare people away. A relationship needs time to build up to something more serious. Don’t smother it too soon. But also cut the cord when you know you are just hanging onto someone until someone better comes along. Don’t date someone just to make your ego feel better or because you are lonely at the moment.
Date with a purpose – to find clarity about God’s will for you and this person. This will make you attractive because when someone knows you are not playing games, they will know you value them if you are giving them your time.
Should marriage be the goal of dating?
John and Ginger Mitchell are a lovely Kelleher International success story living in Austin, TX. This photo was captured during our interview at Mount Bonnell. Thanks to the couple for talking with us about their matchmaking experience and for sharing one of their favorite local spots with us. John and Ginger, we wish you continued wedded bliss.
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In point 1, we talked about the dangers of too much tolerance and not enough judgement. But now we need to talk about the dangers of being too judgmental and not open enough. If you are too serious and you never allow someone to be the imperfect person they are, you will wear them out and they will find you unattractive.
